Another year has come to an end. My 2016 had its ups and downs, but it was also filled with a ton of amazing memories. It wasn’t a bad year for me, it was a year of change, hard truth and most of all, growth.
“When one life ends, another one begins.”
I lost someone important last year. August, the same month my dad passed away, I found out I’m 6 weeks pregnant. At times, it’s almost unbearable that I can’t share my baby with him. It makes me sad I didn’t get to share the news with him. I’m trying to stay as calm as possible and making sure to take care of myself and the baby but sad that he’ll never get to meet my Dad and he’ll never get to meet him. He was such a great grandpa to my siblings kids.
Christmas last year is the first holiday without my father. He was the biggest inspiration in my life and at times throughout my life he was the only person truly there for me. I can’t fathom enough how much I miss him and wish he was still here. When he died, I had no idea what to do, because I was a lot closer to my dad than my mom, so this was devastating.
It’s taken time and major life changes to allow me to accept my grief. This is the most stressful situation I have been in but listening to my doctor, having a caring, loving family to lean on, cry and laugh with, and to just in general talk to, it makes feel at ease. My sadness will always be there, of course. Now I just feel like everything for the rest of my life will be bitter sweet. Every happy thing will be a reminder he isn’t here to share it with our family. I let myself feel the sadness, but I know that he’s in a better place and will be looking down at my little one.
I really hope 2017 will be much better year and I know I’m strong enough to make it my year!